Can you believe the Community Mediation Center of Southeastern Virginia (CMC) has been educating and providing conflict resolution services to families, youth, individuals and the community for the past 19 years?

Last year brought new and unique opportunities for the CMC and, in many ways, it was one of the best years ever. New partnerships were formed, youth peer mediation programs were created and expanded, the CMC partnered in gang prevention and intervention programs and diversified both our training curriculum and customer base. We communicated our message via the radio, internet, blogs, television, newsletters and in person. Our staff delivered presentations and facilitated discussions to city groups, the business community, nonprofit organizations, professional and civic groups, families, courts, schools and colleges and universities. The community at large benefited from these activities. We continue to receive positive feedback. Over 90% of people who used mediation alone reported they would use it again and 85% of all mediations reached a agreement.

It is said that “one great, strong, unselfish soul in every community could redeem the world”. In our community, we are strengthened by many strong souls—our 13 talented staff members, over 60 dedicated volunteers and 18 motivated board members. This devoted group provides conflict resolution training and services, mediation, facilitation and arbitration services to virtually every part of our community. Last summer alone, this team trained over 300 students in conflict resolution skills.

In 2009, the CMC faces the same economic challenges as the nation. How do we do more... with potentially less resources? In their usual optimistic and creative style, the CMC staff views this as an opportunity to continuously improve the delivery of our products and services. We commit to increase our partnerships with other organizations, to offer new and expanded programs and to innovatively diversify our services while maintaining affordable pricing so that we can provide our services to all who desire them. We will continue our focus on youth...helping them resolve their own conflicts so they will not reach negative outcomes. We will help families live together peacefully and co-parent their children in a positive manner. We will increase conflict resolution training opportunities to our community. We are ready to resolve, reduce and prevent conflict.

I continue to applaud and admire the true commitment of the dedicated staff, volunteers, supporters, and our Board of Directors. Our entire community benefits when we all learn how to resolve conflict.

Kim Humphrey

Happy Holidays?

Holidays are supposed to be joyous times, with shopping, social gatherings and the anticipation of some time off to be with family and friends. But for parents going through a separation process, it can be a time of stress, anger and concern over finances and what will happen to their children.

I see it every fall as Thanksgiving apporaches and again during the Christmas/New Year's week. I have had more parents cry during meadions and parenting classes than at any other time of year. They are just overwhelmed by the emotional and financial stress and the idea they are supposed to be happy. I can relate to them because I got my GET OUT! papers the week before Christmas of 1986. I was stunned because I thought we had come to an agreement that nothing would happen until after the holidays. On Christmas Eve, I had dinner with a neighbor who also was going through the process. There was little joy at that table and neither one of us had much to say.

So this past holiday season, I was a little more patient with parents who suddenly became emotional during story-telling or when talking about their children. I offered a time-out and tried to say something to let them know I understood what they are experiencing. Any time of the year is a tough time to be going through a separation process, but the holidays, I think, are the hardest because parents are grieving at a time when it seems everyone around them is having a good time.

Chuck Hardwick

I love being a mentor-mediator.


A mentor-mediator is a Virginia Supreme Court certified mediator that has mediated for at least 2 years & gone through the recertification process at least once. Plus, mentors take special training to learn how to coach mediators-in-training through the sometimes difficult process of learning to mediate.

Of course I love to see my mentees do well. It’s like a baby learning to crawl & then walk. I feel like a proud parent. I’m so blessed to be a part of their certification journey, to make my mark.

But, the real reason I love to mentor is a selfish one. I love to talk about my craft. I could talk about the mediation process and techniques all day (if I didn’t have other stuff to do). Hearing war-stories and OMG moments, makes me appreciate mediation more and more. For me, being a mentor is not a job, its fun! Thinking of challenging scenarios, talking to myself about different ways to say certain things, replaying moments in my head, playing the “what if” game…

To me, the paperwork and extra training is worth it by far. It keeps me as sharp as ever - processing, thinking, learning…

-Amanda Burbage