In the past few weeks I have learned that when there is a conflict going on between family members or friends and they DO NOT ask you for help, DON’T get involved!
My aunt and my sister were having some issues recently and I found myself automatically wanting to help them problem solve. Next thing I know I’m spending half my day back and forth on the phone with each of them trying to neutralize the harsh statements each was making about the other. It took me a while, but I realized they were not ready to work it out right now. They needed time to be mad and say ugly things that they would later regret. Eventually, after they had each calmed down (several days later), they were able to talk to each other and work out most of their problems.
I guess the point of this for me was:
1) If there is trouble brewing, stay out of it unless you are asked to help
resolve the conflict
2) Everyone has a different style of dealing with conflict. Some people can let
it drag on for days, others, like me, need it resolved before I go to bed that
night.
Problem solved, I can get some sleep now!
-Sara Foote
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