Remembering Ken Ferebee


A celebration of the life of Ken Ferebee will be hosted by his family from 4 to 6:30 p.m., Sunday June 8 in Virginia Beach. The address for this very casual event is 5707Oceanfront Avenue. As part of the event, Ken's ashes will be scattered on the beach. I'll be there.

Ken was a volunteer mediator for the Center from 2002 until his death in January 20. His work contributed to the growth of the Hampton Roads General District Court mediation program from less that 50 cases a year to over 300 per year. He also was a mentor and contributed to the certification of many new mediators.

Although Ken and I neither worked nor trained together, his death greatly upset me. We did not socialize outside the Center, except for an occasional manly-man lunch. He mediated mostly in court, while I mediated mostly at the Center. Then I began to think about the things we had in common. We were both fathers. We were both divorced. We were both sucked into the military during the Vietnam War. Neither of us saw combat. Although I was a few years older than Ken, we shared the same musical memories, the same political moments and enjoyed reading the same authors. We remembered the same television programs and the summers before air conditioning. He had a great sense of humor, laced with sarcasm and wit. His one-liners and zingers were so creative, I laughed even when I was zinged. And he was a great curser, especially when working with a balky printer.

Although we were just work colleagues, I still remember the details of our conversations, the dapper way he dressed, the grey in his hair and beard and that wonderful radio voice, booming obscenities at malfunctioning equipment. From time to time, I meet a mediator Ken helped train and the mediator always talks about how organized and thorough Ken was in his work. The mediator world is still touched by him. And I miss him.

So long, Ken.


Chuck Hardwick